Dear E. Jean: What do you do when a friend is a user? This person’s car broke down, she demanded that I wire her a ridiculous amount of money for a tow (or drive 130 miles to pick her up!)—and when I politely refused, she threw a raging tantrum. She routinely lies and invents medical ailments to get out of doing things. What’s the breakup protocol with a friend?

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E. Jean: Nah, this is not a friend. This is a dingbat. Wish her a very happy life, and by ignoring her from now on, you will prevent her from destroying the happiness of yours.

This letter is from the Ask E. Jean Archive, 1993-2017. Send questions to E. Jean at

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